Talie's Guidelines to Celebrating Haitian Flag Day
I will begin this post by apologizing for the fact that I have not posted on here since January 12th. Shame on me.
Today is Haitian Flag Day! Happy Flag Day to all of my Haitian brothers and sisters, and to those who have adopted Haiti in their hearts. This post is for my diaspora people. My Haitians living outside of Haiti who did not get today off to sleep til noon in honor of our flag. Here is my guideline to keeping the celebration alive, even though you are not in a Haitian context.
1. Stop a random passerby in the street or in the office, and give them an obnoxiously long speech about our ancestors leading the first successful slave revolt. Each one teach one.Go to the store and get a megaphone, and get your street evangelist on. Educate the muggles on the army of slaves that defeated Napoleon.
2. Stand in front of your office building and sing “La Desalinienne” at the top of your lungs. If anyone dare question you, Smack ‘em. I understand that some of you may not know the lyrics to the Haitian National Anthem. Which is why I am linking the lyrics to ALL FIVE VERSES. Make sure you sing every last verse. Demand that everyone stand out of respect for your anthem. And that one disrespectful human being that will surely tell you to shut up, I grant you the permission to smack him.
3. In honor of this day, all you lames who like to call yourselves “Haitian Sensation”…STOP IT. It’s not cool anymore. The phrase was only slightly clever the first time it was said. Now all 565,000 of you who have consequently adopted this phrase as your nicknames, I beg you to stop. I’m tired of it, and don’t take this as an opportunity to make up another nick name featuring a word that ends in “ation” …I don’t want to hear any Haitian Domination, Haitian ObamaNation (Yes, I meant to spell it with ‘Obama’), Haitian Creation…just stop it. For the sake of our flag.
4. In honor of Haitian Flag Day, report anyone who posts an ugly photo shopped flyer featuring the Haitian flag as spam. Everyone has that one Facebook friend who thinks they’re a graphic designer just because they learned how to do a few tricks on Microsoft Paint. Tell that person to stop, then report him as spam. We saw some of the worst atrocities committed to our dear flag during Haiti Tourism’s Logo Contest. It’s not okay. Our forefathers did not fight that war for you simpletons to take the Haitian flag, add a few images from “Clip art” and a misspelled slogan, and expect that to be Haiti Tourism’s logo. Absolutely not.
5. And Finally, If you know anyone from France, let them know how Dessalines in all his GANGSTA glory ripped their flag up to make ours. Yes, Dessaline took the French flag, ripped out the white part, and chucked it in the trash… like a G. Then the flag was beautifully sewn together by Catherine Flon to make what we now proudly hail as our flag. If you wish to learn more about the history of the Haitian flag, go here.
On a serious note, Happy Haitian Flag day to you all. Take this day to reflect on our history. Take this day to reflect what role you will play on our ongoing fight for freedom. Our forefathers began the job, we must finish it. I am proud to be Haitian on this day, and so should you.